I’m a Zombie who voted for Clinton


President Donald Trump says millions of illegal votes were cast in favor of Hillary Clinton and many of them were by dead people.  He's right.  I should know.  I am a zombie, and I voted for Clinton. Now, you may try to use facts to argue that I am not a zombie.  I am alive.  I don't eat people.  I don't have body parts falling off.  I don't even watch zombie … [Read more...]

Welcome to 2017! Welcome to the Wilderness.

So here we are -- the wilderness of 2017.  Happy new year. There is a dread that settles over me each morning when sleep fades and I realize once again that it is not a dream.  Donald Trump will be our next President. I begin again to worry about the big things: my children, the planet, my clients, and my job.  But that’s not all ... I also worry about the dismantling of Medicaid, consumer … [Read more...]

The Only Way I Can Cope With This Election Is To Turn To Advent

The only way I can cope with this devastating election is to rely on my faith.  Ironically, on this day of despair, Advent began (for me).  I have taken on the task of writing a new Christmas play for the children and musicians at St. Paul UMC Grant Park.  I enjoy adding humor and cuteness to the story we tell each year of the birth of Jesus.  Advent is the time of preparation … [Read more...]


Ladies and Gentlemen of the internet, I appear before you on behalf of my client the United States Constitution.  This is my closing argument before the Constitution faces the possibility of irreparable damage on November 8, 2016.  Of course, I have not been asked by the Constitution to argue this case, but I have been given written permission by its First Amendment. As a lawyer, I took an oath … [Read more...]

Trump Trump with these Six Simple Ideas

It is the eve of the Iowa Caucuses. And here is where we are at.   Trump is as likely to be our next President as any other candidate.  He gets the most air time, he has the most concrete vision, he is leading in the polls, and his backers are more solidly behind him. This is alarming! So, how can he be beat?  Here are my six simple ideas that I send out to the entire world through the power of … [Read more...]

Despicable T

Despicable T is an addictive farce I have been watching for the last six months. It is about an evil demagogue who tries to steal the White House.  A horde of minions follow him around the country cheering his every word and roughing up those who disagree.  The minions grow in size and fervor with each dastardly speech. The farce is fascinating and fun.  But like any addiction, each time I watch, … [Read more...]

The Winner Who Was Everyone’s Second Choice — Abraham Lincoln

My favorite football team is the Tampa Bay Buccaneers.  They often come in second place.  That is not good.  Usually, second is not anyone's goal. However, being the second choice was the goal of our greatest President.  One-term Congressman Abraham Lincoln sought to be the best alternative in the Republican nominating convention of 1860. There was one favorite at the 1860 convention -- … [Read more...]

Pope Francis: Living What He Believes — Simply and Outside the Norm by Talley Wells

I once challenged my minister and good friend.  He was moving from our modest working class Methodist church to a prestigious wealthy church.  “Aren’t you going against what Jesus taught about humility, simplicity, and the first being last?  Why do the best pastors always leave the poorer struggling churches to go to the wealthy successful churches?” I was being hypocritical.  If I was in my … [Read more...]

Trumptastic Advocacy: Outrageous Outrage by Talley Wells

Donald Trump

Want to hear a joke? Donald Trump. Want to know who is leading the Presidential polls? Donald Trump. I mentioned Donald Trump to an elderly retiree sitting next to me. The man whispered with passion. “I agree with him. He won’t be President, but what he says is true.” “What?” I asked. “He’s going to convince the Mexicans to pay for a wall between our countries?” “Not that,” he says, “but in … [Read more...]